People connect differently. Some need deep conversation. Others need physical closeness. Some crave adventure. Understanding your intimacy style helps you and your partner meet each other's needs.
Last updated: January 2026
Adults (18+) only. Take this quiz together for best results.
For each question, choose the option that resonates most. Don't overthink it. Go with your gut.
Question 1: After a hard day, I most want my partner to...
Question 2: A perfect date night involves...
Question 3: I feel most connected to my partner when...
Question 4: In conflict, I need my partner to...
Question 5: I know my partner loves me when...
Question 6: The thing I miss most in a long-distance relationship would be...
Question 7: My idea of quality time is...
Question 8: When I'm stressed, I want...
Question 9: I feel most alive in my relationship when...
Question 10: The relationship skill I value most is...
Question 11: I would be most hurt if my partner...
Question 12: If I could improve one thing about my relationship, it would be...
Count your answers:
Your second-highest score is likely your secondary style. Most people connect through multiple styles, with one being dominant.
You feel most connected through deep conversation, vulnerability, and feeling truly understood. For you, intimacy is about emotional closeness first.
You thrive when:
You struggle when:
What helps you connect:
You feel most connected through touch, physical closeness, and presence. Words matter less than physical affection and being near each other.
You thrive when:
You struggle when:
What helps you connect:
You feel most connected through shared adventures, trying new things, and creating memories together. Novelty and excitement fuel your bond.
You thrive when:
You struggle when:
What helps you connect:
You feel most connected through ideas, debate, and learning together. Mental stimulation is as important as emotional or physical connection.
You thrive when:
You struggle when:
What helps you connect:
Most couples have different primary styles. That's normal and workable. The key is understanding each other's styles and making intentional effort to connect in ways that resonate with your partner.
Example: One partner is Emotional, one is Physical
Example: One partner is Experiential, one is Intellectual
The goal isn't to become the same. It's to understand what your partner needs and make space for both styles in your relationship.
Couples Flirt includes Soulprint, an in-depth compatibility assessment that helps you understand how you and your partner connect across multiple dimensions.
Adults (18+) only. Private by design.
The four main intimacy styles are: (1) Emotional, connection through deep conversation and vulnerability; (2) Physical, connection through touch and physical closeness; (3) Experiential, connection through shared adventures and new experiences; and (4) Intellectual, connection through ideas, debate, and learning together.
Yes, most people have a primary style and one or two secondary styles. You might be primarily emotional with physical as a close second. Understanding all your styles, not just your dominant one, gives you more ways to connect with your partner.
Different styles are normal and workable. The key is understanding each other's styles and making effort to connect in ways that resonate with your partner, even if it's not your natural mode. One partner might need more emotional conversation before physical intimacy, for example.
Yes, your intimacy style can shift based on life circumstances, relationship stage, stress levels, and personal growth. Someone who was highly experiential in their twenties might become more emotionally focused after having children. Check in with yourself and your partner regularly.
We're building Couples Flirt with deep compatibility assessments that help you understand how you and your partner connect best.
Adults (18+) only. Private by design.